Thursday, 21 January 2010

The Holy Grail

The strapless bra.
Complete waste of time...uncomfortable, unattractive, and always slipping down.
For years I have been saying 'why doesn't someone make a strapless bra based on corset technology?'
With corsetry all the support comes from underneath your bust so there is absolutely no need for a strap unless it is a design feature, no matter what your bust size.

(N.B: I'm talking about proper, good corsetry here girls, not basques or bodices or anything from Anne Summers, or anywhere at all actually, other than a proper corset maker.
I can't begin to explain the difference here, suffice to say, if it has less than 16 bones and less than 8 of them are steel it ain't a corset in my book...or in Dita's book or in any body else's, if they know their stuff.)

Because a corset fits snugly around your rib cage there is no where for your bust to go, it has to remain in the cup that you put it in, it is impossible for a corset to slip down and they never need to be 'yanked up'.
Because the cups are heavily boned you always have a perfect bust no matter how many shapes you throw on the dance floor.
As a perfect example I have a fabulous client who is a big fan of the 'running man' dance move (you know who you are;-)
To my knowledge, whilst donning her Gilly Woo Couture, she hasn't once had to do that awful unsightly 'hoik' action that so tragically accompanies most strapless ensembles.

For years I have been saying 'why doesn't someone make a strapless bra based on corset technology?'

and finally, FINALLY! someone has!!

I can not express how thrilling it was for me to discover this little gem in Debenhams 5 months ago.

As soon as I saw the oddly proportioned architectural esq structure, ( it was bathed in a halo of light, there were angels singing in my head and...) I said out loud, 'BY DIOR! THEY'VE ONLY BLOODY GONE AND DONE IT!!!'

This rush of elation was quickly followed by a swift metaphorical the hovering shop assistant backed away from me with an uneasy look in her eye and I realised, yet again, that somebody was going to make millions out of my idea and that somebody wasn't me....It was wonderbra actually.

1 comment:

  1. Fame at last! I don't mind being outed. I am proud to stand tall and say YES, I break out the running man on a regular basis (and when 6 guys spontaneously move a fussball table out of the way to maximise your moves, you know they're fabulous)and YES my award winning rack always looks like it is going to spill forth from my cups in bounteous quantities, but never EVER does. Right, where are my MC Hammer pants...