The Naked Honest Truth.

Preface:

Today I started to compose a post (imaginatively titled 'It's All in the Jeans';-) it was (perhaps not surprisingly) to be about finding the perfect pair of blue jeans.

I am lucky enough to have found a pair which are, in fact, 'perfect' for me and I found that by drawing from my own experience and recommending my 'perfect' pair to those of you with similar proportions to me I would have to discuss my own figure with you in some detail, otherwise how would you know?

As I began to write down my statistics I went off on a tangent and decided to prelude 'It's all in the Jeans' with this post, I hope you find it interesting. I will talk about denim tomorrow. x

P.S please bare in mind...SIZE DOESN'T MATTER:

*Gilly Woo's vital statistics: for your information and comparison, (also useful when buying me presents;-)

bust 38", waist 30", hip 38", height 5'9", weight 10st12lb, inside leg, 33", bra 34E, shoe 7, dress 12, (quite well proportioned, bit of a flat bum, fairly low natural waist.)

It is good for you to know these details about yourself and not just guess them, get a tape measure and check out your statistics, write them down and keep them in your purse, take note of how your body changes, most of us fluctuate from week to week and our bodies change as we get older or have babies, knowing your actual shape will help you make good choices when buying clothes.

You'd be surprised at how many of my clients think they are taller, shorter, slimmer or fatter than they actually are. Just this weekend I dressed a gorgeous woman in her sixties who told me she had awful legs, instead of taking her word for it I asked her to show me, actually, her legs were a great shape, they just had an uneven skin tone, I insisted she try a pencil skirt with opaque tights and she liked it so much she bought it, changed into it and strutted off to Harvey Nicks for a glass of champagne, (invoking a compliment from a random stranger on her way I'll have you know:-)

The media publishing pictures of celebrities and randomly sticking numbers next to them which they claim are their correct statistics doesn't help women to be realistic about their figures.

It's all nonsense of course, do you really think Cheryl Cole is gonna stand on a set of scales in front of a fashion editor or a news room to confirm their guess work? No. Ridiculous isn't it?

The only person who knows what Cheryl Cole weighs is Cheryl Cole (and maybe her personal trainer.)...and why do you care anyway?

The Fashion Industry is a Bitch.

It will build you up and knock you down at every opportunity.

On the one hand shops make their standard sizes subtly bigger every year to fool you into thinking you are slimmer than you are.

On the other hand they tell you you have to be smaller and smaller to be attractive.

It doesn't matter what it says on the label as long as it fits you, don't buy a skirt that doesn't suit you just because it's a size 8, it doesn't make you a size 8 it just means you now own an incorrectly labeled garment that doesn't suit you.

Size Zero

I had a Saturday job at The Gap 14 years ago and I sold size zero jeans.

At that time I wore an American size 6. American sizes are different to British sizes, an American size 6 equates roughly to a British size 10, but not exactly, the proportions are different, a UK10 would be far too small around my waist but probably fit my hips ok (because of my flatish bum) a USA6 fitted me for the same reason.

By this token a UK6 (USA 2) could comfortably wear a size zero jean if she had a smallish bum.

I realise that a UK6 is little but it's not ridiculous! a petite woman of 5'2" could easily be a healthy, curvy sexy UK6.

God only knows why the British media have felt the need to make such a massive drama out of it now!

Your dress size is not a bloody status symbol, it's just your dress size and it really doesn't matter what it is at all as long as you are a healthy weight. If you're a size 14 in Topshop and a size 16 in M&S so what? get to know your favorite brands and you'll always know what size to try...and by the way 6ft tall models are not a size zero...I work with them, I take their real measurements, trust me, the media make it all up.

While we are on the subject of models...do not be under any illusions that models are just a pretty face, there is a definitive skill to looking good in a photograph, and taking direction from a photographer, you could be the most beautiful person in the world and not make it as a successful model.

(N.B. Why ever models are such aspirational figures is beyond me! being photogenic is lovely I'm sure, making a career out of it might be a nice way to earn a living but it's not easy money, it's hard graft!)

This may be controversial, but the fact of the matter is thin people look better in photographs.

(Let me be clear, I promote a healthy body image and I am fully behind the idea of banning models with an unhealthy BMI but some girls are naturally very thin)

They are easier to direct because there are less distortions when they reposition themselves and there is less airbrushing with angular subjects which means less time and less money needs to be spent on an image to achieve a slick and professional result.

Hiring a thin model to make a pretty picture is the same as hiring a courageous fireman or a brainy lawyer, there is nothing more to it than that.

Please bare in mind that just because a girl is a model does not nesascerily mean that she is always the sexiest woman in the room, she is just the most photogenic....

(...also please don't hate her because she is beautiful, she is only doing her job and does not necessarily have an eating disorder.)

There is one more myth that I would like to put to bed please...

Marilyn Monroe was NOT a size 16.

I have been in the room with, and seen very close at hand actual dresses that Marilyn Monroe wore and, (unfortunately perhaps,) I would not have fitted into any of them, Marilyn Monroe by today's standards was around 5'4" and a size 8-10. Get over it.

N.B. If you use the measurements from a size 12 1950's commercial dress pattern they would equate roughly to a modern day size 16, Marilyn Monroe may have, once, (when she was having a fat day) worn a 1950's size 16 dress but she probably had to have it taken in even then.